Darth Vader was kinda emo.

i wish there were more comics about darth vader being sad

Lockjaw and the Pet Avengers # 1

Reed Richards is on the moon informing the Inhumans that the Infinity Gems are out there somewhere and that only people with steely resolve should find them. As fate would have it, everyone's favorite mustachioed giant bulldog with a tuning fork coming out of his head, Lockjaw finds the Mind Gem. He teleports back to try and tell Black Bolt, Medusa, and Reed but they ignore him because he's obviously just a giant dumb dog. Medusa tells him to teleport away and Lockjaw does going to Central Park.

He meets Throg, the guy who got turned into a frog and then found a piece of Thor's hammer turning him into a Thor Frog. The Mind gem has created a mental link that allows Lockjaw to communicate. He convinces Throg to join him on his quest to find the rest of the Infinity gems. They then go to the X-Mansion and recruit Lockheed, who is depressed because everyone he knows is dead or gone. Next up they recruit the Falcon's falcon who believes himself to be superior to everyone else. Next they run into Hairball, Speedball's pet cat with the same powers (why Hairball is no longer P-Cat, The Penitent Puss is not explained). Pestering the crap out of Hairball is Ms. Lions, Aunt May's pet male dog. Ms. Lions is apparently retarded and everyone hates him, just like Aunt May.

Lockjaw then takes the world's best animal superheroes to the Savage Land where they find the TIME GEM, which gets put into Lockheed's care. Then a T-Rex shows up and the issue is to be continued.


Someone should buy me this or a Throg action figure if there is one.

Where have you gone SUPER COOL CAT

HA, HA! OLD TIN CANS ARE BEING TOSSED AT HIM JUST LIKE A REAL YOWLING CAT GETS PELTED !


animal abuse isn't funny and i think that sentence has poor grammar.

UNCANNY X-MEN #509

The X-Men are enjoying their new, idyllic life in San Francisco: a beautiful, tolerant land where mutants can live openly, a land where they are free to carry out their own brand of lawless, brutal justice in the streets, free to instruct young children while dressed in garish S&M costumes.


It all seems too good to be true, and naturally the state of California has introduced a ballot initiative (Proposition X) which would institute mandatory sterilization of all mutants. Cyclops feels confident that the measure will be defeated, but the others are (perhaps justifiably) uncomfortable with their right to breed being put to a vote. On top of that, Scott has to deal with everyone crawling up his ass about the supposed problems he's having with Emma. Apparently everyone in his life has pinned all their hopes for love on the success of this relationship, but maybe the guy just feels like sleeping on the couch sometimes, y'know?

As if the prospect of forced castration and relationship trouble weren't enough to keep him up at night, Scott's demented ex-wife (X-Wife?) has assembled a Sisterhood of Evil mutants, full of vague, supernatural plans for destroying the X-Men and conquering death that center on reincarnating Psylocke as their mindless slave and repeatedly stabbing Wolverine. This is what you get, when you marry the evil clone of your high school sweetheart and then act all surprised when she becomes The Goblin Queen.

Thor #601

In this issue, everyone is as busy as beavers!

- Thor sits in a field pondering the fate of his hammer, which broke a little after he smashed his grandfather in the face with it;

- Balder agrees to relocate to Latveria, despite his reservations;

- Dr. Doom researches exotic foods on Wikipedia;

- Volstagg becomes hopelessly drunk, shares a moment of tender understanding with a goat, throws things around, and yells at his fellows for abandoning Thor ("codpiece sniffer" is not an accusation to be made lightly, but Volstagg was angry and ashamed and I understand why he felt like he had to go there);

- a beautiful lady of Asgard falls in love, quite plausibly, with a short order cook

and there was some other stuff about Loki's female form actually being the body of Thor's beloved Sif, and that she's going to die now that Loki is abandoning it. IDK, I didn't pay much attention to this, except to wonder how Thor failed to notice that his evil half-brother had been reincarnated in the body of his estranged lover. Thor: God of Thunder, not Keen Observation.

Daredevil #118

Daredevil gets yelled at by his supporting cast, who disapprove of his alliance with the Kingpin, and more generally of the way in which he's been fucking up his life and the lives of the people around him. Foggy, in particular, is so pissed that he fires Matt from their law firm. Can he... do that? Meanwhile, Kingpin bickers with the ghost of his ex-wife (who appears to be literally visible to him), and sends Leland "The Owl" Owlsley to hire Lady Bullseye for a mysterious job. Maybe his plan is to hire her to kill HERSELF.

wolverine the movie

just like the comic the movie is pretty generic. wolverine was cooler back when he didn't know anything about himself and didn't show up in every other comic.